Do you ever notice that bad luck happens to the same person over and over again? If that person is you, don’t worry. You’re not alone.
We all have that friend who has all of the luck on their side. But, that friend’s life is boring and not entertaining in the slightest. The unlucky people like you and me make for a much funnier article. So enjoy.
Look, I don’t care what anyone says. If I’m stuck in a bathroom stall and I look over and see this, I’m running out immediately.
No, I’m not even going to pull up my pants and I’m certainly not going to take the time to get any toilet paper out. I’m going to be going au natural.
What Would We Do Without Our Family?
Family is everything. That is, until they start to embarrass you in public. As soon as that starts to happen, they’re not everything anymore.
The less attention on you and your loud family, the better. Eventually, there comes a time when you get over your family embarrassing you and love them for who they are. That time is not in your teenage years though.
Cover Your Children’s Eyes
Honestly, this is just another picture that proves that you really shouldn’t meet your heroes. Shrek is one of the most recognized faces in the world, but he’s not what you think he is.
Here’s a picture of him being detained outside of a Walmart for throwing eggs at customers as they walk out.
Privacy Is Overrated
Who wants to be going to the bathroom and also making eye contact with all of the customers leaving CVS? I mean, for me, that sounds like a dream.
Even though the customers probably wouldn’t be able to see, uh, anything, it’s still incredibly awkward to be going to the washroom and having a staring contest.
Okay, so there aren’t many ways to know if someone is hiding dead bodies in their basement, but this is one of them.
If they hold their fork with a grip tighter than a seam sealed bag, they’re capable of mass murder. I hate to go there, but it’s just science.
Sleeping Over At Your Friend’s House
When you’re sleeping at your buddies house, you don’t really have any room to complain.
You feel awkward asking for blankets or pillows, so you just work with what you have. Usually, you end up sleeping on the hard floor with a ladder as a blanket and a brick as a pillow.
That Beer Ain’t Going To Drink Itself
This woman has more dedication to her beer than many people have to their marriages. She broke both of her arms and is still not letting that stop her from chugging her beer.
This is what blockbuster movies are made of. If this doesn’t inspire you to win the day, I don’t know what will.
Nothing Good Can Come Of This
This is why it’s never a good idea to go into water at night. I can barely do it in the daylight. Why? Because I like to see WHAT IS UNDERNEATH ME.
Like, if you’re about to step on a stingray, you would probably at least like a warning. Unfortunately, that warning never comes.
The perfect selfie didn’t exist, until now. I’m sorry, this has got to be the best timing for us and the worst timing for her.
We get to laugh while she gets to have her brand new white jeans completely ruined because her dog decided to eat the front lawn again.
Looks Like A Dream
Can you imagine planning a beautiful cruise getaway only to have it sink? I mean, if you’re going to sink out in the ocean, it might as well be on a ship with a waterslide and buffets around every corner.
It’d be a much more enjoyable experience than if you were on a fishing boat or something.
Bubble Wrap Is Needed
I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t be leaving my house for the rest of my life. Something in the universe wants this guy dead, obviously.
After the monkey attack, I think it would be time to call it. Grab bubble wrap and sit in the basement for the rest of your life.
Turn That Smile Upside Down
I get it. You’re at a festival and it seems that nothing can bring you down. That is until a full cup of water smashes all over your head.
First of all, there’s no way to recover from that just looking at a reputation standpoint. Second of all, trying to enjoy a concert while you’re wet really sucks.
I think the dog’s motivations and intentions were in the right place, but the knowledge just wasn’t there.
The pup just wanted to keep its owner hydrated while she tans in the sun. It’s so easy to forget to drink when you’re under the sun. I just don’t know that this is necessarily the drink of choice.
When Your Younger Sister Is Getting Married Before You
As much as you don’t want to think that there is competition between siblings, there is. This older sister is finally realizing her younger sister is farther along in her love life than she is.
The only way she can cope is trying to fit as much food into her mouth at once.
“We’re Going To Have To (Hair) Cut This Short”
Imagine sitting for a haircut at the barbershop, feeling giddy about the fact you’re going to be looking fresh, only to end up in handcuffs?
Not only that, but your mugshot looks like this. This is some unfortunate looking hair. He for sure had to cut this haircut short.
Another Day, Another Starbucks Misspelling
Well, be more specific. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that Starbucks employees don’t have a degree in spelling names.
You can say your name is Julie, and you’ll get “Jewlee” written on your cup as if that’s the common spelling. Cark might be the next big name, who knows.
I don’t know what I would be more mad about; the car or the spaghetti.
Honestly, that would be a difficult decision. Eating and driving has unfortunately become common for most of us. We’re on the go and don’t have time to eat dinner, and so we have to muck on the road.
I don’t care if I just bought this house and it’s my first night living in it. I’m moving out so quick this ghost won’t know what to do.
The house can sell for one dollar for all I care, I’ll lose all my investment. It’s not worth the trauma of having a roommate you can’t see.
Note to self, never try to get a painting done of me when I’m feeling down. This is awful. She looks like she’s incredibly sick.
She looks like she hasn’t seen sunlight in over three decades and she’s only 16. The Mona Lisa called, she wants her pastel look back.
Spoke Too Soon
This is painful to look at. Having your morning coffee is the only way that most of us can get through the rest of the day.
It’s our lifeblood that allows us to tolerate our annoying co-workers. Without it, you might as well just go back to bed in my opinion.